The December Rebellion
What If Rest Was Your Most Radical Choice?
"Rest and laughter are the most spiritual and subversive acts of all. Laugh, rest, slow down."
— Anne Lamott
Last Christmas, I found myself staring at our ornament boxes with complete dread. For years, I'd been the sole orchestrator of our family's holiday traditions—elaborate decorating, prime rib on Christmas Eve, the works. Everyone else showed up to enjoy the finished product while I ran myself ragged creating the backdrop for memories I was too exhausted to be present for.
That's when something shifted. I gave myself permission to ask a dangerous question: What if I just... didn't?
The Greek Lasagna Revolution
Instead of prime rib—which required constant monitoring and perfect timing—I made Ina Garten's Pastitsio (Greek Lasagna). Still fancy. Still delicious. But I could do all the hard work beforehand and just pop it in the oven when guests arrived.
Instead of elaborate decorating, we did minimal and collaborative. My grown kids helped. We kept what brought us joy and released what had become performance.
The question that changed everything: Who was I trying to impress anyway?
The result? Christmas 2024 was the most restorative December I'd had in years. I was actually present for the moments I'd been killing myself to create. I had meaningful conversations. And I actually enjoyed the meal I'd made while it was still warm.
Here's what surprised me most: I accomplished everything that truly mattered, and I did it better because I wasn't running on empty.
What's Really Happening in December
Our culture has created a toxic relationship with this month:
Year-end panic pushes us to "finish strong" and make the year "count"—as if January 1st is some kind of deadline for your worth.
Holiday perfectionism adds elaborate celebrations on top of regular responsibilities, because apparently, we're supposed to execute flawlessly at work while also creating an Instagram-ready home.
Rest guilt tells us downtime must be earned through exhaustion, not claimed as a basic human need.
Comparison culture floods our feeds with highlight reels that make our need for simplicity feel like failure.
The result? We enter the new year depleted rather than renewed. We've "finished strong" but we're too burned out to enjoy what comes next.
Your Body Knows the Difference
Your body knows before you do. That dread you feel? Information, not laziness.
When traditions that brought joy now feel heavy, something has shifted. Listen to the resistance—it's telling you about your season, your capacity, your actual needs.
The question isn't "How do I force myself to want this?"
The question is "What is this trying to tell me?
Change ONE Thing!
I'm not going to give you seventeen strategies for surviving December. Instead, I'm offering you ONE diagnostic practice that will teach you something essential about yourself:
Choose ONE December tradition or obligation that fills you with dread, and simplify it radically.
Not everything. Just one thing. The thing that makes your chest tight when you think about it. The thing you're doing because you "should" or because "everyone expects it" or because you've "always done it this way."
Then pay attention to what happens.
If your dominant feeling is relief—you were forcing something that wasn't actually yours anymore.
If your dominant feeling is disappointment—it was more aligned than you realized, and maybe the simplification went too far.
Most likely? You'll feel relief. And that relief will teach you something important about what season you're actually in.
What Simplification Looks Like
🍽️ Exhausted Host: Order the main dish and make ONE special side. Or switch to brunch—easier timing, lower stakes.
🎁 Gift-Giving Anxious: One meaningful gift per person. Consumables only. My family's rule: if you must give, make it homemade.
🕯️ Decoration Overwhelmed: One focal point per room. Fresh greenery and candles—that's it. Nothing requiring a ladder.
📅 Social Calendar Drowner: Accept half your usual invitations. Practice: "That sounds lovely, and I'm not available."
The Script You Need
When people question your choices (and they will, because your rest often triggers their discomfort with their own pace):
"You're not decorating this year?"
"We're doing it differently this year—simpler feels better.""But you always make prime rib!"
"I'm trying something new that lets me actually enjoy the evening.""You're not coming to [event]?"
"I'm choosing to be fully present for fewer things this season.""Aren't you worried about disappointing people?"
"I've decided to prioritize my presence over my performance."
You don't owe anyone an elaborate explanation. "This is what works for me this year" is a complete sentence.
What This Actually Teaches You
Here's why this ONE simplification matters: it's not really about the specific tradition you change. It's about learning to read your own resistance as information instead of something to override.
When you choose to simplify one thing and pay attention to how it feels, you're practicing a skill you'll need in January: discerning between forced effort and aligned effort.
December becomes your training ground. The holiday obligation you release teaches you what "forcing" feels like in your body. The relief you feel when you stop forcing teaches you what alignment feels like by contrast.
This diagnostic information is gold. It's preparation for the deeper seasonal work that January invites.
Go Beyond the Reframe
Outdated thinking: "I should be doing more to make this season special. If I simplify, I'm letting people down."
Your REFRAME: "My presence is the gift. I'm choosing to protect my capacity so I can actually show up for what matters most."
Outdated thinking: "Rest must be earned through exhaustion. If I haven't pushed myself to the limit, I don't deserve to slow down."
Your REFRAME: "My presence is the gift. I'm choosing to protect my capacity so I can actually show up for what matters most. : "My presence is the gift. I'm choosing to protect my capacity so I can actually show up for what matters most.: "Rest isn't a reward—it's a requirement. I'm strategic about my energy because I want to be present, not because I'm lazy."
Outdated thinking: "Everyone else seems to handle this fine. Something must be wrong with me."
Your RREFRAME: "Different seasons require different capacity. Honoring where I actually am is wisdom, not weakness."
December Rebellion
1. Identify the ONE thing you're dreading most this December—the tradition, obligation, or expectation that makes you want to hide under the covers.
2. Simplify it radically. Not a little bit. Not a compromise. Radically. Order instead of cook. Skip instead of attend. Delegate instead of manage. Eliminate instead of perfect.
3. Notice what happens in your body. Relief? Guilt? Freedom? Anxiety? All of it is information. Write it down.
4. Protect your choice. When people question it (and they will), practice your script. Your worthiness doesn't depend on justifying your needs.
The trees don't apologize for their winter form. They don't hustle to prove they're still valuable. They simply trust that rest makes spring possible. What if you trusted the same thing?
Leading the rest revolution, 🕯️✨
Andrea
Chief Reframing Officer @ Beyond the Reframe
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I'm Andrea Mein DeWitt—author, Professional Certified Coach, and self-proclaimed warrior in recovery. After 32 years in education, I transformed my career in my early 50s and now help high achievers stop forcing their way through life and start living it. I write from the San Francisco Bay Area, where I live with my husband Bill, our yellow lab Maggie, and a perfectionist inner critic I've learned to befriend (mostly)."
My book Name, Claim & Reframe: Your Path to a Well-Lived Life was featured on NBC's TODAY Show as 2023's best motivational read. The audiobook just dropped on Audible, because transformation shouldn't require sitting still.
