The Intelligence of Imperfection
Why "Good Enough" Is Actually Brilliant
If you're anything like me, you struggle to shake your perfectionistic tendencies. But the truth is: None of us is perfect (even when we try). And which of us wants to hang with someone who pretends to be flawless anyway? Not me. Trying to "be perfect" is unrealistic, but that's not the only problem. Perfectionism is restrictive, steeped in fear, and profoundly inauthentic.
"Perfectionism is the voice of the oppressor."
— Anne Lamott
What if You Gave Your Perfectionism a Name?
Ophelia the Perfect Oppressor
Instead of trying to obey perfectionism's demands for good behavior, what if you personified that voice as a pesky little tag-along?
I call the perfectionistic voice in my head Ophelia the Oppressor, because she oppresses my creative thinking and urges me to "play by the rules." She also:
Rejects every "imperfect" or unexpected outcome as a FAILURE
Second-guesses my provocative thinking
Has me questioning myself until I GIVE UP (or stall out)
Chastises my spontaneity and curiosity
Urges me to "stay inside the lines"
Ophelia has good intentions—she wants to keep me safe (mostly from embarrassment). She doesn't want me to "mess up." But she's also a real stick in the mud, if we're honest.
When Ophelia Showed Up Uninvited
Recently, one of my clients was struggling with her own voice of perfectionism. She'd been working on launching a new service for months but kept finding reasons why it "wasn't ready yet."
"The website needs another round of edits."
"The pricing structure isn't quite right."
"I need one more certification before I'm qualified enough."
Sound familiar?
Our conversation made me think about all the reasons we need to send Ophelia (and her friends) packing—and the intelligence that lives in our imperfect, messy, beautifully flawed work.
Why Perfectionism Is Holding You Back
Seeking Perfect Never Moves Us Forward: Having the goal of perfection holds us back from our creativity and ingenuity. Think about it—your best work comes from trial and error. It's the imperfections and unexpected outcomes that enable our work to become great. Perfect is VERY uninteresting. It's the rough edges, counter-intuitive routes, and boldly broken rules that make our work provocative, unique, and unforgettable.
2. Imperfections Help You Stand Out in the Crowd: Unusual perspectives, by way of counter-intuitive routes, signal to others that our work is significant. If our work were "perfect" and fit in with everyone else's ideas, everyone else would have done it already.
Yet it's only the bravest of us who are BOLD enough to step into our real (imperfect) work.
We will NOT conform.
We will NOT change ourselves.
We will NOT obey. (We will remain imperfect in our plight!)
As the saying goes: "Well-behaved women rarely make history."
Try being a little naughty and instead take the road less traveled. It's truly the only way to break new ground.
3. Perfect Isn't Trustworthy, Likable, or Authentic: The mess is where the magic happens.
Perfect is a lie! Nobody is really perfect, right? And who wants to follow or admire someone who claims to be flawless? Revealing your imperfections, struggles, and face-plants is what makes you both relatable and accessible to others—especially the people who energize your spirit and those you're trying to reach. We trust the honest souls who tell real stories, because they're the ones who give us hope and humanize life's journey. Share your mess—it makes you more likable.
4. Perfect Is Restrictive: Even if we do manage to achieve something "perfect," it's NOT sustainable.
How can we improve on "perfect"?
It's a dead-end and a limiting outcome that doesn't make room for growth or improvement. Goofs are greatly undervalued! When we claim our imperfection, we welcome learning, adaptation, and modifications we might not have considered without stumbling. Imperfect things create chances for us to become better, faster, stronger, and more informed. CLAIM every opportunity to learn something new.
5. Trying to "Be Perfect" Is Really a Cover-Up for Fear
This is the big one. The most convenient way to avoid putting your brilliance out into the world is to aim for perfection. If you hold back on releasing an idea, product, or service because it's "not ready yet," then YOU have given up on YOURSELF. You're missing out on the opportunity to glean new insight, pivot your marketing strategy, and improve your sales pitch. Your dreams and hopes don't have an expiration date—so trust yourself and take just one small action toward your goal. If you never try, you'll never know. And the action of trying allows you to learn new skills and gain insights you'd never discover otherwise.
STOP using perfection as a cover-up for fear. Rather than "being perfect," I invite you to "be willing" to put something imperfect out into the world. If the only thing holding you back is fear, that's actually good news—it's something you can overcome.
The Intelligence of Imperfection
Here's what I've learned as a recovering perfectionist who hates messy unknowns: Joyful disorder may just be a kinder and more intelligent way to live. When we're willing to put something imperfect into the world, we force ourselves to realize that the only thing holding us back is our fear. And that can be overcome. Besides, the odds are with you: There is only one way to be perfect, but there are tens of thousands of ways to be imperfect.
Sending Ophelia on Her Way
The next time Ophelia pipes up with her oppressive perfectionism, try this: "Thanks for trying to keep me safe, Ophelia. But I'm choosing courage over comfort today. I'm putting this imperfect thing out into the world anyway."
Then watch what happens. You might stumble. You might learn. You might discover something you never would have found if you'd waited for perfect. And that's not just okay—that's brilliant.
Ready to give "imperfection" a try?
Celebrating your courage to be beautifully flawed,
💫 Andrea
The Global Authority on Cognitive Reframing
P.S. For more on silencing your inner critics and stepping into your authentic power, explore Name, Claim & Reframe: Your Path to a Well-Lived Life and work through the practical exercises in The Name, Claim & Reframe Workbook.
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I'm Andrea Mein DeWitt—a leadership coach, author, and self-proclaimed warrior in recovery who helps bold souls reclaim their power and unleash their full potential. After transforming my 32-year career in education into a dynamic coaching practice, I now guide people through my signature NAME, CLAIM AND REFRAME® methodology.
My book Name, Claim & Reframe: Your Path to a Well-Lived Life was featured on the TODAY Show as 2023's best motivational read. Writing from the foggy San Francisco Bay Area, I believe that life's challenges are invitations to discover who you're meant to be.
