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There comes a time in all of our lives when we may need to evaluate our relationships, making sure that they are having a positive effect on us, rather than dragging us down. Sometimes, without realizing it, we may be spending our precious time and energy engaging in friendships that let us down, rather than cultivating ones that support and nourish us along our path. Life, with its challenges, is difficult enough without us allowing people into our sacred circle who drain our energy. We are empowered to do so much more in this world, when we are surrounded by people who understand what we're trying to do and who positively support our efforts to walk our path. Energy is contagious, why shouldn’t we surround ourselves with those who inspire, support and energize us to step into our very best selves. We can begin by simply noticing how we feel in the context of our close relationships. We may start to notice that an old friend has the tendency to dance more in negative stances or ideas that we ourselves need to let go of if we want to live closer to our core values and life purpose.
Additionally, we may also find that we have a long-term relationship with someone who has a habit of letting us down, or not showing up for us when we need support. There are many ways to go about changing the status quo in situations like this, having a heart to heart with our friend or modeling for them how we’d like to be treated through example. This isn't so much about abandoning old friends as it is about shifting our relationships so that they support us on our journey rather than hold us back. In "Dare to Lead", Brene' Brown calls this sacred circle of supporters her “Square Squad” or the few people in life whose opinion really matters to you. But...here’s the catch, you HAVE to FIT all their names on an extra small post-it note. Makes you stop and think, doesn’t it?
Here’s some things to consider when choosing YOUR square squad: Who leaves you feeling energized? Who inspires you and helps you to learn new things? Who supports you to stretch yourself? Who do you trust with your vulnerabilities?
What did you learn by thinking about who belongs on your own Square Squad? Another important part of this exercise is that it gives us an opportunity to notice what kind of friend we are to the important people in our lives. We might find that as we adjust our own approach to a relationship, challenging ourselves to be more supportive and positive, our friends make adjustments as well and the whole world benefits. What is one commitment you can make to strengthen YOUR Square Squad and limit time in relationships that hold you back from who you want to be? I’d LOVE to hear from you… Reply to this email and share what you are learning or visit my website to learn more about how life and leadership coaching can help YOU set a clear path for the future.
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